Sliver bullets and prenatal care

My dearest Julie has dealing with severe heartburn especially at night throughout this pregnancy. It is so bad that it wakes her up at night. In addition to that “Cate” only is awake at night kicking. Last night was especially bad during the lunar eclipse. From this information I have deduced that the donor sperm we received from the cryobank must have been infected with lycanthropy.

Yes, that’s right our dear “Cate” is a WEREWOLF!!!

Go ahead and doubt me if you will. But, tell me if any of the cryobanks test for lycanthropy let alone do they even test on nights of the full moon. Yes I believe that our dear “Cate” will be force to join team “Jacob” oh, poor Edward. That childhood choice has been taken away from her.

I discussed theory with Julie’s doctor. Oh yes, she laughed, even scoffed but she not deny the possibility. Trust me a woman in her position will take all precautions. When she creepily hugs me and my wife during each appointment she is really checking our reactions to her defenses. Trust me no doctor naturally smells of garlic and wolfsbane like she does.

So as Julie gives birth I know we will be protected for our pediatrician will be armed to the teeth with silver bullets and holy water. She will be prepared for all contingencies. I know both “Cate” and “Julie” are in good hands.